Breaking Down Walls & Learning to Trust Again

"I have been seriously hurt before in past friendships and put up some walls around myself to protect my heart from being hurt again. Because of this, I have struggled with friendships for years, but now I believe that God wants a change in this area of my life. He wants the walls to come crumbling down."

Are you like this lady?

Have you been hurt before in a friendship?

Did you build walls to stop the hurt?

We probably all have in one way or another--but there is a way that the Lord wants us to deal with it.

Let's take a look a five things to remember when something like this happens in our lives:


1. GOD HEALS ALL THINGS. 

God is the Healer of all things. He can mend a broken and hurt heart, repairing it to be even stronger than it first was. Sometimes He allows hurtful experiences into our lives so that we can learn and grow in character from them and we must be wise enough to not allow them to destroy us.

2. GOD WANTS US TO HAVE COMMUNITY. 

We weren't meant to live this life alone. There are many Scriptures on how we should treat, love, and live among each other. This is how He is glorified here on earth and even how the Gospel is spread to those who don't know Him.

3. GOD WANTS US TO FORGIVE

We need to face reality--there is no such thing as a perfect friend. Friends will make mistakes, say wrong things, not always be available when we need them, and so forth. But if we are honest, we have probably done the same things too and/or maybe just not have noticed it. God wants us to forgive and move on. Remember that our trust is in God and not in our friendships. Only God will not fail us but others will. It is a great comfort to know that God is faithful and is always there for us.

4. GOD WANTS THE WALLS TO COME DOWN.

If you have built up walls it is time to tear them down. These walls can hurt yourself over time. Becoming isolated and alone without fellowship from other believers is no way to live. You are missing out on God's best for you. Tear down the walls and experience God's blessings over your life through those around you.


5. THERE IS FREEDOM IN CHRIST. 

When you live inside walls that you have built yourself and have not let others in, you are making yourself a prisoner of your own life. But the reality is that with Christ there is freedom. We do not have to let the shackles of past hurts haunt us into the future. This is where we need to draw the line and start living in the freedom, love, and grace, that our Lord has blessed us with and always points us towards. God will not steer us wrong and we can trust our hearts with Him!


And finally, I encourage you to to take action steps and pray about how you can be a good friend to others, without any expectations, so you can bring glory to Him.



A prayer for you:

Dear God, please help the dear sweet soul who is reading this today who has suffered from past pain and has trouble trusting again. Please help her to heal, forgive, tear down the walls she has built, and move on to the future of what You have in store for her. Wipe her tears from her eyes and make her hard heart soft again. I pray blessings over her and that you would surround her with love and help her to trust again. Thank you for all that you do and all that You have already done. May Your name be glorified to the ends of the earth. We pray this in Jesus' name--Amen. 



If you would like more encouragement in this area, you might want to check out Messy Beautiful Friendship: Finding and Nurturing Deep and Lasting Relationships. It is written by a pastor's wife:

"Women long for deep and lasting friendships but often find them challenging to make. The private angst they feel regarding friendship often translates into their own insecurity and isolation. Christine Hoover offers women a fresh, biblical vision for friendship that allows for the messiness of our lives and the realities of our schedules. She shows women

- what's holding them back from developing satisfying friendships
- how to make and deepen friendships 
- how to overcome insecurity, self-imposed isolation, and past hurts
- how to embrace the people God has already placed in their lives as potential friends
- and how to revel in the beauty and joy of everyday friendship

With stories of real friendships and guidance drawn from Scripture, Hoover encourages women to intentionally and purposefully invest in one of the most rewarding relationships God has given us."

You can get this book HERE.







May the Lord help you to move forward in your life and the area of friendships!




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