"Do not be deceived, God cannot be mocked,
for whatever a man sows that he will also reap."
Today we are covering Chapter 8 of the book The Most Important Place on Earth: What a Christian Home Looks Like and How to Build One. If you would like to join us, there is still time and you can get your book HERE.
There are two important types of discipline that we will be talking about today.
One is used as a verb--a person who disciplines himself.
The other as a noun--a person that is disciplined (by another).
Or as the author would say:
"The person disciplines himself --or is disciplined by a coach or parent--so that one day that person can have the sheer luxury and joy of having discipline."
A trend that is now in Christian homes would be parents that are afraid to actually discipline their child. They allow their child to do what they want, run the home, talk back, and be out of control. Sometimes parents do this because they want to be their child's friend so that they are loved by the child. But the reality is that what the child really needs is a steadfast, loving parent who can teach them the path to self-control and discipline in their life.
First off, when a child is out of control or not obeying, we need to love our child by disciplining them, Disciplining them should:
- be direct
- not feel good
- be swift
- and be participatory
That means you, as the parent, need to do the work of showing them what needs to be done. The Scriptures say, "He who spares his rod hates his son, but he who loves him disciplines him promptly." Proverbs 13:24. This is not talking about abuse, but lovingly correcting your child so that it may benefit him for the rest of his life.
Mr. Wolgemuth also shares:
"No screaming or yelling. No bullying or foolish threats, just a simple thorough explanation of the rules and your expectation that your children follow them."
"You do not call out orders to your children as a dictator would his minions."
These things should be done with love, patience, and a calm spirit (yes, we know it is easier said than done, but don't give up!). Disciplining your child is important because it is obeying God, brings glory to Him, brings peace to your home, and encourages your child to know right from wrong and grow into a responsible adult. It is a win-win situation.
Now the second type of discipline we need to help and teach our children in, is to have discipline in their life. Areas that should be discussed would be:
1. Work - having a strong work ethic and not being lazy
2. Food - having control eating
3. Money - to be wise in spending and not a spendthrift
4. Language - using words that bless others and speak honestly, not speaking impulsively but wisely
5. Leisure time & technology - how we use our downtime and not over indulging
6. Driving - staying within speed limits
7. Modesty - dressing appropriately
Helping our children to have discipline also teaches them self-control and the fruit of the spirit. As they learn to obey us, it helps them to also learn how to obey God.
"But the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self control; against such things there is no law." Galatians 5:22-23
And finally, we know that this is a major task but do not become weary as you train your children. God has equipped you with everything that you need so long as you lean on Him. He loves your children even more than you do and you can trust Him as you raise your children for Him.
What would you add any other helpful tips to teaching your child?
We'd love to hear them- please share them in the comments below!
If you are joining us for the first time, we are going through this book for the next few weeks and would love to have you join us! We will cover a chapter a week and in case you missed it be sure to watch the video and get the A-to Z Bible Verse Printable to do with your children (we'll be doing it too). The book is still on sale so it is a great time to get it!
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