Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Gifts--Not Monsters

"Look at her, she is such a monster."

I heard this not too long ago and felt such sadness---this was actually a mother describing her daughter in a very bitter, sarcastic and resentful way. I think that what we describe our children as reflects not the children but what is going on in our own hearts--"for out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh." (Luke 6:44-5)

If we truly believe that children are a blessing from God we should refrain from using language that demeans them as inferior. The use of such sentiment and the like might be used affectionately or jokingly but can eventually lead to viewing children in a wrong and sinful light.

With our tongues we are to encourage one another and build one another up (I Thessalonians 5:11) and this verse includes our children.

What It Teaches Our Children

How does a child evaluate themselves as they hear mom and dad referring to them with such words? Will they not have a low self esteem? Will they not try to live up to what they have been 'branded' as, even in jest? If they have been created in God's image then they are not what these words define them to be.

Remember that 'the tongue has the power of life and death' and we need to be wise in how we use that power. Are they truly gifts or burdens as how the world would like us to believe? If God's word is true we need to believe it ourselves and act as such. They will have a hard time believing they are a child of God is somebody if calling them names.

And as we think about that--name calling comes from pride-not from humility, we have to remember that it is not Christ-like and could have lasting repercussions on a child.

What It Teaches The World

We are to be teachers of the Word and not of the world. We are to be an example to the unsaved and bring light to the darkness--but how can we do that if we do not have a biblical worldview of children ourselves?

 Does the world see a difference in how we view children or just go away shrugging their shoulders not touched by Christ's powerful hand in our lives? We are essentially teaching the world and our fellow Christians to hate and disdain children which is the spirit of Satan who is anti-God. We have become teachers of Satan. Instead, we should be teachers of God's Word teaching what is right and not what is opposite to His Word.

So the next time you see a mom with a lot of children I want you to think about how God gave His life for these children to be saved. How they are His gift from up above--some of those children could very well be your brothers and sisters in Christ.

Be sure to speak blessings into their mom's life-----encourage her and support her. Let her learn from your example to love her children. This is what she needs---not the witty remark of 'doesn't she know how to stop having all these children." Shame on those who have thought this or stood by quietly without coming to her defense. I am shocked when I hear a statement like this in church, the one place a mother should feel the most welcomed!

Children are a blessing and gift from the Lord, let us all have a biblical worldview when it comes to children and reject the lies that they are anything less. Teach this to your children and your children's children so that there will be a generation that will hold fast to God's Word in this dark, evil world that despises and murders millions of innocent children because His Word has been forgotten.


Karina said...

Thank you! Do mind if I copy this and share this with others as long as I give the credit to you?

Tracy said...

So true!

Mrs. White said...

This is such a wonderful reminder. I have often seen an exhausted mother in the supermarket with a toddler who is throwing a fit. Her other children are giving her a hard time. I look at her with warmth and a knowing smile and say, "They are precious." These mothers really appreciate the remark and feel supported that their children are normal and just having a bad couple of minutes as they all do. We need to have an eye of compassion to see through the children's sin nature and see them through the Lord's eyes.
God bless them.
Mrs. White

Bonnie said...

I am so blessed to read these words I'm practically dancing around. Amen and Amen!!! I especially can relate to feeling passionate about mothers feeling safe and welcome in church with ALL of their children. Thanks so much for this blog. These words are like water to my thirsty soul!

Angela said...

amen amen amen...I find such encouragement and blessings from your blog. Truly Proverbs 27:17 is found here on my journey...Blessings sweet sister in Christ.

Mrs. June Fuentes said...

Dear Karina,

Absolutely--good to see you are still visiting here! Hope all is well and many blessings to your family...

Deanna said...

Very nice post today.
Wonderful when we believe our children are gifts from God.
A blessing and not a burden.

Ann at eightacresofeden said...

I am sure as the mother of twins you have also been on the receiving end of 'Oh no double trouble'.. this is one of the main comments I receive when out and about with my children, however last week at the supermarket a man came up to me and said to me 'You do realize they are both delights'... oh how it encouraged my heart. Aussies are quite forthcoming and I have to say some of the most positive comments have come my way from complete strangers. Another time I overheard the supermarket manager telling her friend 'see those children - they are the beautiful children'.. I almost broke down and cried! But yes, I wonder why Christians are not the ones offering such encouragement. We should be leading the way! My last post was on 'Raising Well Mannered Children' and I have outlined some of my positive encounters with people who have been affected by my children as well as lots of practical advice for mothers of young children.

Linda said...

Children are indeed blessings. Gifts from God. I had three and wish I had known then what I know now,...I would have let God give me as many as He wanted to give me.

We have had 14 grandchildren,...and three of them are in heaven,...plus some miscarried babies that we never met.

God is the giver of life. I wish more people understood that.

Thank you for this post,...and for the reminder to cherish our children and to welcome all of the weary mothers in the church and anywhere we see them,...and to offer encouragement to them.

Linda @ Truthful Tidbits

Leah said...

Amen Amen and again AMEN! It's amazing how we can affect others too with our language and behaviour - we need to 'infect' other Mothers with our biblical and glorious approach to mothering...and bless the world!

Pioneer Mom said...

Thank you Mrs Fuentes! I have only recently begun to view my children as blessings and gifts, and they are such nice children after that. I read many articles on Above Rubies and have been a different mother ever since. Our children are not kids anymore, they are lambs! I am so thankful to have been able to learn all this while I still have time and our children are still young. I love your blog, and come here for encouragement often.

onesmartpiggy said...

I am enjoying your blog so much! I started following it a few weeks ago and have found so much encouragement and insight here. Thank you!

Alison said...

I recently found your blog, and I love this post. I have twins (a comment mentioned you did as well) and a friend has triplets. We get heckled, seriously, heckled when we go out together with all the kids. People walk by and call us crazy, or ask which twin is the evil one, or worse! They do this without even engaging us, or allowing us to respond! They just say something awful and keep walking! Luckily neither of us have a problem standing up for our children or our motherhood! My least favorite is the evil twin comment. I usually say "no child is evil unless you teach them to be. What are you teaching my children?" I've come up with other responses that are not as abrupt, but seem to difuse things quickly. Like "double trouble" = "nope, double blessing" or "you've got your hands full" = "and my heart too". Anyway! Great post! Thank you!

Suzanne said...

Thank you for posting this. It may be a shame when worldly secularists speak of children as burdens and show contempt for large families, but when Christians (who after all should know better) do it, it is a scandal and a disgrace.

Anonymous said...

OH this is sooo good that I'm just gonna leave yer blog up today to read and glean from here-and-there throughout my day! (((((HUGS))))) sandi

Lisa said...

Hi there, I'm a joyful mother of 4 writing from London, England. About 2 years ago God smote my heart regarding this very issue, when I viewed my (then) 3 children as a burden, not a blessing, I didn't know how to parent them. God showed me my selfish heart and when I repented and accepted wholeheartedly the blessings handed to me, He then gave me a yearning for another child - something which I'd previosuly been closed to. So i totally understand this post. Btw, I found this blog about 3 months ago and I just want to thank you for every word of it. You helped inspire me to take the plunge and homeschool my 3 older children. God has given me a vision for my family and He led me to your blog at just the right time! Thank you, keep up the God work!! xx

Allenalic said...

Please give me advice as what to do. I am in tears over how my husband has been to our 5 year bold son. My son's real father hasn't been in his life since he was around 5-8 months old and I raised him til he was 3 1/2 years old. That's when my husband and I got married. My son is very strong-willed but has a good heart. My husband has spanked and said many a thing he should never have to him. My husband is saved, but has some serious issues with being a father to his stepson. I pray and pray and pray and sometimes have to step in when the Spirit is so grieved by his actions/words. Others have noticed it to. He almost expects him to be a robot or a full grown, mature adult. It's so heartbreaking and I feel if it doesn't stop, our son will rebel in his years to come. Please help. I feel like I can't say anything or ask for prayer without dishonor for my husband. I am at wits end.

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