Monday, August 4, 2008

The Bitter Woman

Life has its highs and lows---unexpected change can come, death, a move, financial issues, marital problems. If we are not careful to think biblically, something dangerous can set in. It is called bitterness. Here are some of the signs:

Common Signs of Bitterness:

1. Gossip and Slander

2. Ungrateful and Complaining

3. Judges Motives

4. Self-centered

5. Excessive Sorrow

6. Vengeful

7. Brooding

8. Loss of Joy

9. A Critical, Judgmental Attitude

Entertaining bitterness can result in a woman who acts out and yells at her husband & children, pouts to get attention, name-calls, criticizes, manipulates by crying (or silence) to get her way, and acts no less like a child who is throwing a tantrum. Only now, the scary thing is...she is a full blown adult! It truly defiles her family and herself. (Heb 12:15)

Are you that woman?

It is so easy to take our eyes off Jesus. Like Peter who began to sink in the water as he took his eyes off Jesus--we are no different. We simply cannot allow circumstances to rule our moods or our lives. This is not just a form of tearing down our homes, but also SIN. We are called to self-control. This means not just externals but the ever so important internals. The fruit of the spirit is abounding in love, joy,peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. (Gal 5:22)

Problems affect all of us. I believe our greatest need apart from Christ is knowing and trusting Scripture to help renew our minds. Do we really believe the promises? Do we trust God with EVERY aspect of our lives (not just the ones that are easy to surrender)? How great is our faith? If it is small, we had better make sure to pray for that small mustard seed to grow.

If God truly directs our paths, then we should have no need of worry. We don't need to react. He is in control, not us. We are blessed to have a Solid Rock, a firm Foundation. We cannot be swayed emotionally to and fro like the waves. We must close and guard the door so that bitterness cannot sneak into our lives.

Bitterness grows when you 'take into account a wrong suffered' (1 Corinthians 13:5) but Hebrews 12:15 teaches us to:

"See to it that no one comes short of the grace of God that no root of bitterness springing up causes trouble, and by it many be defiled."

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Anonymous said...

You know what, I have genuinely been this woman in the last year or so - towards the person I love the most.
God has been constantly thrusting me into a challenge to change, and slowly but surely I am. Always with His strength.

Thank you for another reminder of what God wants me (us) to be, June!

Anonymous said...

Dear Mrs. Fuentes;

I must say that bitterness can come so suddenly and then it makes a home inside of you. We women, tend to allow it to grow just like a week.

We must not take our eyes off our Lord, if we do we will sink.



Tiffany said...

Wow I really needed this as a reminder today. Bitterness can come so suddenly. Thank you for this reminder.

hip chick said...

This is an excellent reminder. I find it is something I work on all the time. It's very easy to slip into bitterness when you have 3 teenagers in the house who never clean up after themselves. But, there are special rewards from God when our hearts are in the right place.

Persuaded said...

Amen and amen!

As a single mom it would be easy to sink into bitterness and self pity- easy that is, except that the Lord commands me to be "contented in whatsoever state I am in" to "be joyful alway" and to "give thanks." And when He commands us, to do something He always enables us as well. Praise His Holy name!

Thank you so very much for this timely reminder((hugs))

Trish said...

This really spoke to my heart this morning since I've been dealing with my own lack of self-control. God is dealing with me and I'm praying and working. Thank you for your wise words, and also for the gentle way you present them.

Heart 4 My Home said...

Following the LORD'S prompting in writing this is such a timely read. What a grand blessing you are. Thank you ever so much.


Anonymous said...

Hi I'm peter, I'm married 25 years now and my wife and I are at bitter ends. Four years after our marriage, I was fooling around with another young lady whom I meet at work; I was never sexually involved cause the Holy Spirit stepped in and I ended the relationship, however my wife could never let go of that part of our live's though it was only a brief time "less than a year" that I knew the other woman. Today after five beautiful and God blessed children and 22 years later she just can't forgive me. I meet my wife in high school and have loved her ever since. I have never had a sexual relationship with any other woman but her, this I state true, because I've loved the Lord Jesus Christ since a child; however, my wife has never believed me, since my ordeal with the other lady. She calls me a deceiver and a liar! We continue to have bitter and bitterer arguments years after year. It has gotten to the point were she resents me and says vile and hurtful things. I never knew a woman's words could be so deadly that it shatters your very being. I feel physically drained when she's through with my ass! Her words assassinates my very character, and what hurts me the most is "she does it infront of our kids". "Oh God", I know I hurt my wife, there's no denying it, but I just don't have the strength anymore to continue in our marriage. Please pray for me, I wish God would just take me so the very presence of my being would not "Hurt Her Anymore". There is nothing I would not give up to turn back the hand of time, God knows; I'm Sorry.

Emily Cana said...

Hello, I just wanted to thank you for writing this post. I looked down the list and realized that it's easy to be someone who gets hung up or jaded by hurts. I got hurt and grieved. Later, was angry and got stopped before I became bitter. I picked up some enjoyable hobbies and good friends, so life got a little brighter. I'm glad that I stopped by! Trusting God even more today!


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