A long time ago a little girl grew up in a home far away. This home was a pretty home and kept quite clean. On the outside the home was well manicured and flowers grew and adorned the little home. No one passing by would ever think there could be anything going on wrong inside that home. No one knew that the parents in that home argued all the time and cursed at each other. Who would have known that they even physically abused each other except for the little girl. The little girl watched quietly from the corner, trying to be quiet, trying not to stir up any more trouble. All the while, the little girl was learning. Learning what anger was, and learning what it was to lack self control.
"Do not make friends with a hot-tempered man, do no associate with one easily angered, or you may learn his ways and get yourself ensnared." Proverbs 22:24-5
As the girl got older she would notice that sometimes she felt very angry. She wasn't able to communicate it well so she turned to alcohol to absorb those angry feelings. Her life spun out of control and she wasn't quite sure were to turn. Later she married and would find herself angry sometimes at her husband and then later--- her children. Soon she saw anger reigning in the home. There was yelling, tension, internalizing and strained relationships. She knew this was not the life she wanted to live.
Anger can destroy. It destroys lives, homes, people....think of it of a tornado that comes and demolishes everything in its sight. What are some ways we communicate anger? I believe we communicate in three different ways---through body language, tone of voice and words.
Anger is reflected by rolling our eyes, crossing our arms, shaking our finger, an angry glare. Anger in our voices is reflected in raising of the voice, yelling, but not always. Sometimes anger can be found even in a whispered tone or by clamming up. Talking quickly sometimes is an indicator of anger so when you feel your words rushing together---beware! Our words can be destructive if given in to anger as we know from scripture that 'the tongue has the power of life and death' Proverbs 18:21.
What happened to the little girl? She grew up angry indeed but later learned about Christ and gave her life to Him. She learned about the sin of her anger and repented and with the help of God she slowly learned to control her anger and to have self control. She knew she did not want to continue the cycle of anger in her home or for future generations and God richly blessed her efforts. It didn't happen overnight but God was faithful to begin the work of patience in her life. He was patient in instructing her as she learned about having self control over herself. She also learned to forgive her parents who are divorced today.
God can change your life if you deal with anger. Anger is a deadly poison that corrupts entire generations. If you deal with anger, you are not alone, the culture that we live in promotes anger as a way of life teaching it through movies, tv shows, etc. Turn against anger today----surrender yourself to God and ask Him for help in dealing with your angry ways. Learn when you are starting to become angry and train yourself to have self control (1 Timothy 4:7b). Anger is a heart issue---find out what is making you angry. Is it sin? Is it selfishness? Is it pride? Is it not getting your way?
Don't waste any time! Start today by making changes in your life! And remember, if you've been living in anger for your entire life you most likely will not be able to change overnight. Be patient and know that God is faithful in the changes He is making in your life! He loves you and has not forsaken you! And know that He will finish the good work in you as He continues to make you His new and beautiful creation.
"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!" 2 Corinthians 5:17
10 comments:
I don't remember how I stumbled upon your blog but I am glad that I have. Your posts are so thought-provoking, inspiring, and encouraging. I visit every day. God bless you and your family!
I must agree, very though-provoking posts.
It was nice to see you all at the Whitcomb Conference a couple of weeks ago.
God bless you all!
Wonderful thoughts. And I enjoyed reading your most recent post about motherhood. Thanks.
I found your blog a couple of weeks ago from a comment you left at Homeliving Helper and it is wonderful!!! I have been reading through it a little at a time, every day and have learned so much.
I have a question for you, I don't know if you'd have time to address it, but you seem like you might know the answer... what can a wife do if her husband is the one who is angry? Thanks in advance, for any suggestion you might have. :-)
Hi Kitty,thanks for visiting--the Lord has been good in allowing me time to post! In regards to what a wife could do for her husband if he struggles with anger, my response would be to daily lift him up in prayer for his weaknesses, just as she would want him to do for her in her weaknesses. It would not be wise to point out his anger and nag argue or belittle him. She could also be a godly example in the home and ask the Lord what lesson He is try to teach her---for example--patience, long-suffering, endurance, faithfulness during this difficult time. It would be important to not learn the ways of anger and herself become ensnared, so therefore, I would also encourage her to be in the Word. She could meditate on Scripture regarding peacemaking and the like to strengthen her through the day. I hope this helps.
These suggestions really DO help!! Thank you so very much!! :-)
I was that little girl, only I didn't grow up to drink...but to eat. I am angry, and am working on the whole self control thing. This post makes me believe that there is hope for me. Thank you!
Many Blessings :)
Ace
WOW---I was that little girl in that family w/the "perfect house & outside"! I also have a younger brother (3 yrs. younger than me) I tried to protect,and did. I grew up to become that alcoholic!(By the grace of God--18 yrs. sober). I still have ALOT of fear of MY anger (which I ALWAYS turn inward !!!). I pray about it, but still don't know how to deal with it in a healthy manner. It affects my health! I didn't even marry until I was 40, because I didn't want to live like my parents. My husband is a good man, very kind to me, struggles with his Christianity! Thank you so much for ALL your thoughts. I LOVE your blog !!! Love to you-Beth
Your blog has been such a blessing to me! I have only been following your blog for a few months, yet have gleaned so much from you. This post on anger has especially been convicting and inspiring! I would love to ask you a few questions (concise and brief) related to the topic of anger, if you would be able to email me. Also, my son, Aaron (age 9) has recently started reading your son's blog (The Mission). Today he said, "Wow, Mom. This is really inspirational. Is that how his mom's blog is for you?" Thought you could pass that on to your son. I'm sure Aaron will send his own comment one day.
Thanks again for your ministry!
Mrs. Claudia Evans
clevans@sunflower.com
Dear Mrs. Evans,
Thank you for taking the time to comment--I will be emailing you shortly!
Many blessings...
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