Friday, October 12, 2012

When Our Children Sin

"Folly is bound up in the heart of a child..."

Yes, our children will sin. There is no question of it. I think it was funny when I look back as a young mom and didn't think that my only child did. My older daughter, who was a lot smaller at the time, was a perfect angel---or so I thought. Yes, I know that sounds far-fetched, but I was naive and didn't "see" or want to see it.  But the true reality was that she was definitely a sinner needing the grace of God just as much as her unsaved mommy did.

So why is it that we are always surprised when they sin? No, instead we need to know that they will sin. To expect it and be ready and prepared to react in a godly fashion. I have learned over time it  is a lot easier if you are prepared. Especially when you have 9 children, as it seems there can be violations all the day through. That is what parents are for, to be an authority figure guiding them in the speedbumps of life.

Children are a lot LESS experienced than us. It hurts me to hear small children getting cursed out by parents who seem to think their child needs to act and perform perfectly like an adult (who sin as well). They are not robots, nor are they our trophy children. They are on loan to us from God for a limited time and we must be faithful with the time that we have.

But we are not here to have PERFECT children. We need to remember that they are not perfect, but are sinners in need of a Savior. They desperately need parents who will lovingly share Jesus and carefully show them the way to Him. As parents we will always struggle doing this since we are not perfect parents but we must strive to do what is right and not grow weary in the process.

They also need parents that have MERCY. We cannot come off as harsh, religious, hypocrites if we are wanting to parent well. We need to exhibit love, patience, kindness, mercy, humility, understanding and be slow to anger. This will win a heart, the opposite will repel it. My father-in-law is a great example of this. He is patient and slow to anger and always has arms outstretched to love on someone. He always shows overflowing love to all his grandchildren (he has 21 of them, and 2 great grandchildren) and they would just absolutely do anything for him.

Think of how God has drawn us to Him. It wasn't through harsh demanding means. Often when I see Him working through sin in my life it was through His kind love and that is what drew me in closer.

Do NOT become discouraged. Children WILL sin and we need to guide them and show them the way.  We must remind ourselves that it is all part of God's perfect plan to work all things together for the good of those who love Him according to His purpose (Romans 8:28).

The fruit of this parenting journey is that we are being refined right along with our children and for that we need to praise to Him as we seek to build strong homes to bring Him glory.


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Stacie, A Firefighter's Wife said...

Something else you to need to know is when they sin is that you need to be able to stand by them and walk with them through the terrible consequences. We do not abandon them in their hour of need. I am talking to parents of older children. Sometimes their sin is humiliating, and feels unforgiveable, but we must forgive and we must love them through it.

Susie said...

Great post, June! Such a great reminder to us all:)

Mrs. June Fuentes said...

Dear Stacie,

I couldn't have said it better myself!

Many blessings...

Mrs. June Fuentes said...

Thank you, Susie. This is a reminder for myself as well!

Many blessings...

Anonymous said...

This is really good. Hope to see more! God bless you!

VerityGrace said...

Thank you for this post. So true, and a beautiful reminder of the grace God offers to us all. I have linked to it on my blog. :)

Susie said...

Thank you for the encouraging words. I agree that we need to be there for our children and help them. I am struggling with one of my older darlins' who has chosen a life away from God's teachings. I still love the "sinner" so much, and they know how much, though I cannot accept the sin. I pray daily and say words of encouragement to help the "sinner" see the wrong, but I cannot separate my love ever! I so wish I could scoop up my lost one and never let them go. I do have faith that they will return to God and salvation. ☺

Joyfulmomof6 said...

Beautiful and humble reminder...I got saved a few months after my oldest daughter was born (17 years ago) when I was 27. I knew absolutely nothing about parenting- except the psychobabble from secular parenting magazines, which of course teach the exact opposite of God's ways. It was very hard to get those wrong ideas out of my head, but the Lord was patient and gentle with me and I was able to be patient and gentle with her.
I always say raising children are our means of sanctification! I still mess up all the time, as we all do.

Susie- My heart and prayers go out to you. It sounds like you are doing exactly what the Lord asks. It's hard to watch someone you love stray.

Barbara said...

Hi, I just love this time of year, and love your blog too, sorry I have not been around much, trying to get back into the swing of blogging again, and visiting all my favorite blogs too. Have a great Saturday, and such a beautiful fall day here in Georgia. Hugs my friend.

Anonymous said...

I love your site! This is what wives and mothers need. I wanted to email you about a different topic. I saw something today that just broke my heart. It is related to children and sin. It is about Amanda Todd. She was a young girl that suffered much from bullying and was haunted by past sins. Here is a link to a video she made shortly before she committed suicide. This is so tragic. I cannot imagine growing up now with facebook and the internet. I really think this should give parents a warning about the dangers of facebook for children. I know Amanda's parents were divorced. She really felt that she had nobody. She was surrounded by people at school and nobody would talk to her. Sheltering your children is good. This girl should have been sheltered from these things. Think how differently this girl could have lived if her home had been happy and safe. She could not see past highschool and the bullying. I remember being in highschool and doing things I deeply regret. Thank God that we do not stay in highschool forever. Thank God that we have forgiveness in Christ. God has used my past to bless my future. While in highschool, I never could have imagined that God would bless me with my husband and our beautiful children. This girl could have grown into a godly wife and mother. She could have lived had she only known how precious she was to our Lord.

In Christ,

Crystal Trigg said...

Can you please tell me where I can find a print of the mother in her chair with a baby on her lap and her daughter standing next to her? I think she captures the essence of lovely motherhood! Thank you.

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