Mothers should naturally be very good at raising daughters because, after, all they are women like we are. But sometimes mothers can become exasperated with their daughters for that very reason: they are so much like us.
The first things mothers must remember is in raising young women is to be kind. A critical spirit is a destructive thing and mothers must not be too hard on their girls. Mothers are naturally prone to be easier on the guys, but this must not be.
Mothers must not attribute motives to their daughters, nor take offense, nor lose patience, nor take things personally as they are raising their daughters. Rather they should put on tender mercies. This is a tall order, but we must not cut ourselves slack when it comes to holiness.
Women are the role modes for their daughters, and they must teach them about meekness, submission, respect, deference, courtesy, and holiness by example. This does not mean that a mother of sons does not have to model these graces. But daughters must look to their mothers as primary examples of their future callings.
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14 comments:
Thank you so much for this encouragement! I needed this reminder. I love my girls and they are so precious to me. I want to breathe life and love into them, but often fall into my flesh rather than choosing holiness. I am inspired by your blog.
Dear Bonnie,
So do I--my oldest daughter is now 19 and I look back and see mistakes I have made on the way, they definitely make me more determined to try to be a better mother with my younger daughters.
Many blessings..
I have regretfully been very critical of my daughter. I thank God for teaching me patience and self-control, as I strive to be a better mother.
I am so thankful that you wrote this, one because I need the reminder for I so quickly forget! And secondly because I think women in general have a harder time with other women and when our daughter are older, it may just be them! This is something for us to be on guard about, protecting our daughters hearts is so important, and yet so often they follow us :( and not always in a positive way!
Thank you for this! I have two daughters and I have often been hard on them. They are both teens now and I am glad to be reminded of this when I need it most!
So thankful for this post. As the mother of 3 girls, with one being extremely strong-willed, I find it very hard and trying to be vigilant in demonstrating kindness, patience and gentleness. An extremely tall order for me with my oldest. Thank you for the reminder and the encouragement.
This is my first visit to your blog. Thank you for such an encouraging post!
Hi Deanna,
I sent another email out to you tonight, with the ebook attached. Please let me know if you get it!
Many blessings...
I really needed this! I am a young mother of four children, two of them being daughters. One of our daughters is extremely willful. Admitedly, I am hard on her and impatient.
To be honest, I'm quite exasperated right now! My deepest desire is to be a godly woman, and to raise godly daughters... but I'm discouraged by my own failures, and the seeming lack of progress by my little girl.
I'm afraid I may "ruin" my daughter by a poor example, or completely mess up, or not do things right and right out FAIL as a godly mother.
Any encouragement from a mother who's been where I'm at... and made it through to the other side?
Thank you for this post. I often find myself critical and impatient with my daughter. I want to be a good example for her and I pray for wisdom and a meek and quiet spirit daily now. I need lots of help to form loving habits. Praise God for the good work he continues to do in each of us!
What a beautiful and timely reminder. I have 3 daughters of my own- 2 sons. I was just talking to my husband the night before, how I am aiming more and more to put on a smile around the house, so they do not view being a mother as drudgery. I apologized to my eldest daughter of 8, recently for putting too much pressure on her. I have to remember that she is 8. The thing is she is so much like me, takes after me in so many ways, that i have a hard time realizing that she is not my double ( oh how I would love to have a double some days : ) I am lenient with purpose when I recognize I am having my expectations too high. I think to myself, I am 30 and I am still learning- so I can not them to do it exactly like me. It really is about being the parent to my children as the Father is to me- so full of mercy and grace.
What a beautiful page!
~~Ramona Halfmoon-Samson
walker105@live.com
Thank you for this reminder. Having been raised by a critical mother myself, I know the damage it can do to a mother/daughter relationship. I vowed when my daughter was born to be a different kind of mother, but I'm afraid many times I've fallen into the same destructive attitudes towards her.
I am determined to be more aware of how I talk to her and definitely need the Lord's help in it.
Jane
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