tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1984956841131982891.post6301186540936374727..comments2024-03-07T06:59:20.347-06:00Comments on A Wise Woman Builds Her Home: What to Do When Grandparents Are Missing In ActionJune Fuentes @ A Wise Woman Builds Her Homehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01821276536385551195noreply@blogger.comBlogger10125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1984956841131982891.post-84756262262235774682015-07-17T08:30:59.859-05:002015-07-17T08:30:59.859-05:00Our situation is that my in-laws don't agree t...Our situation is that my in-laws don't agree that we've had six children. For years, they have favored the older two only wanting anything to do with them. The next four have various health issues (nothing serious) so they want nothing to do with them as they aren't perfect in their eyes and have pointed fingers at us saying if we didn't have more children, then there wouldn't be the health problems involved. Sadly, they are very appearance oriented. <br /><br />They've made it clear many times that it's unfair to the older children to have more children as they deserve lots of attention. Mind you, we homeschool and don't do a lot of outside activities so our children get lots of time with us. We also have always made it a point to take our children out individually to spend time with them. My in-laws have different beliefs than we do about homemaking, homeschooling, being believers, and trusting God. We had to put up boundaries with them because their behavior had become destructible. Likewise, after my last pregnancy, they sort of decided to neglect all of these grandchildren and focus on another grandchild since that is this other couple's only one (my husband's brother's child). As for my parents, they live out of the country and my children see them once a year.<br /><br /> It's sad for my husband and I to see our children without close relationships with their grandparents. I grew up with having very close relationships with my grandparents. I always wanted that with my children. I liked the idea above about adopting a grandparent. We might need to do that one. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1984956841131982891.post-4155544561513343102015-07-14T06:48:08.459-05:002015-07-14T06:48:08.459-05:00Great post! Where my child doesn't have grandp...Great post! Where my child doesn't have grandparents missing in action, she unfortunately has an aunt that is. It breaks my heart - both for my child and her relationship to her aunt, as well as the relationship I long for to have with my sister again. Your points listed are great encouragement, thank you so much for sharing them.<br />Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10086883716707598658noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1984956841131982891.post-11153180369053158482015-07-11T14:12:33.541-05:002015-07-11T14:12:33.541-05:00My advice would be to never say anything about it,...My advice would be to never say anything about it, ever. When we express our feelings in certain situations, we're only likely to drive the wedge in further. We cannot guilt someone into loving us or our children. We can pray, ask God to reveal to us if we need to make any changes on our part, and seek to adopt the elderly that may need a void filled themselves. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1984956841131982891.post-75704774851703885462015-07-10T11:28:22.790-05:002015-07-10T11:28:22.790-05:00I can very much relate to this.I do have a questio...I can very much relate to this.I do have a question,and any advice would be greatly appreciated.My inlaws have 3 grandchildren(our two children,and then one other grandchild)they are are very much active in the other grandchild's life...but doesn't even pick up the phone to call, or visit our two children,(and we live 15 minutes awa).Its like they play favorites..and the sad thing is, our daughters can sense the favoritism.It has always been this way,its so hurtful,and makes me upset and angry,and I don't wantt to feel this way:(Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1984956841131982891.post-68922802683791081422015-07-10T07:09:06.556-05:002015-07-10T07:09:06.556-05:00Our daughters (2) grand parents moved to FL like o...Our daughters (2) grand parents moved to FL like over 2yrs ago,we live in MI. One daughtet is 12 the other 3,my husbands mom lives 3 hrs away,shevhas no car, our youngest ment her 1x. And as for my parents that moved to FL our youngest really didnt know them either. Breaks my heart,I know how important grandparents are,I didnt see mine alot but I spent nights with them and had time and memories with them. My prayer would be that a couple would come into our girls lives and adopt them into their lives and hearts as grand children.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1984956841131982891.post-83753381755432402992015-07-09T22:33:59.396-05:002015-07-09T22:33:59.396-05:00Thank you for this post. I have a 7,5 and 3 year ...Thank you for this post. I have a 7,5 and 3 year old. My parents don't know my children. Both have chosen to live different lifestyles that is not ok for children to be involved in. Both my parents have relationships with my siblings and there children. Hard but life goes and i have been so blessed to have my husbands parents and grandparents to be a big part of my children's life. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1984956841131982891.post-76107599632916674912015-07-09T22:20:19.923-05:002015-07-09T22:20:19.923-05:00Eventually the children figure it out when they ge...Eventually the children figure it out when they get older Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1984956841131982891.post-22755161754218209272015-07-09T17:32:38.581-05:002015-07-09T17:32:38.581-05:00I have just the opposite situation. I have reache...I have just the opposite situation. I have reached out countless times to my grandchildren but they never respond. I've called, sent card w/$ for birthdays, holidays and nothing in return from them for years now. I am to the point that I have given up on all of them. They are old now, 18 - 24 years of age, if I ever see them again that will be nice, if I never hear from them again, that too will be nice. I'm too old to beg for a relationship with any of them. I'm sure when I drop dead, they'll be the first ones at my ranch looking around to see if I left any of them a dime. Ungrateful, heartless, unthankful generation.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1984956841131982891.post-43621211326711053402015-07-09T12:12:25.172-05:002015-07-09T12:12:25.172-05:00Our sons were adopted after our all four of our pa...Our sons were adopted after our all four of our parents' deaths. They have lots of aunts, uncles and cousins from whom to learn the family stories. Our sons' Godfather has very elderly parents and they have, in many ways, become the boys' grandparents. it is a nice relationship.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1984956841131982891.post-49027092021972462602015-07-09T11:43:13.742-05:002015-07-09T11:43:13.742-05:00One suggestion is to find a "substitute"...One suggestion is to find a "substitute" grandparent. Our children have wonderful grandparents who are involved, but they all live out of town. We contacted our church to ask if there are any elderly people who would enjoy some younger company once in awhile. The pastor gave us some names to choose from. We simply chose based on location, so we now visit a lady for an hour once a month whom we call "Grandma Doris." Our kids know that she is not their "real" grandma, but they still get to treat her like one with drawings, cards, prayer, and flowers, and she treats them like grandchildren - treats, hugs, prayer, and love.Kayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02964130188755389401noreply@blogger.com